what i am loving right now

Wednesday, April 30, 2008
-inspired by DON-

*he brought me cheesecake after the draft
*i'm one test away from ending my college career (i owe spelman NOTHING after 3 pm)
*beer and a shot of 151 (followed by rum and cokes)
*waking me up to make love
*syncronized thought
*the dallas cowboys
*waiting to walk across the stage
*emails between fellow bloggers
*bloggers who comment regularly on my posts
*how my clothes fit me now versus this time last year


things i'll do when/if i have kids

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

i need to know the kids my kid(s) play with and their parents. just because they are not exposed to something at my house does not mean they won't be exposed to it around other kids and in their homes.

- from Will and Grace-
At Mason's swim meet:
Cheryl: Mrs. Walker? I'm Cheryl Bricker-Fossberg, Taylor and Hayden's mom.
Karen: I have no idea what you just said

how do you feel?

Monday, April 28, 2008

i just found out that everything i ever used was tested on an animal in some stage of it's creation process. i don't know how i feel about that. though i don't often, i eat meat. i eat chicken, i eat fish, i eat crabs, i eat shrimp... also i consume dairy.

is one form of torture more justifiable than another? animals are slaughtered so i'll have something to eat and there are others with short, miserable lives so i can look decent. moreover, testing on rats and other animals with similar a genetic make up to humans is how we get all the vaccines and medicines and treatments i appreciate when i get sick. which is worse?

what are your thoughts on the whole animal testing thing?

here is where you can find lists of companies that do and do not test on animals:

The Draft!

Saturday, April 26, 2008

it's that time of year, again. the nfl teams are making rookie selections. how did your team do? i hope my team, the dallas cowboys, does well!!!!! how bout 'em?

we indeed have done well with the exception of not getting a wide receiver. i can't really complain b/c i have a friend who thinks JJ might be tryna get Chad Johnson or Roy Williams.

*side note: wtf, keyshon? that just is not cute, what you are wearing. i dont care what runway/magazine you saw that on/in

at t's request

Friday, April 25, 2008

T asked that i post my thoughts on the Jay and Bey nuptuals or lack there of. so here is why i did/ do not care and tried to avoid announcements and coverage at all costs. 

first, that has no affect on my life. their combined millions have no bearing on me. they are not members of my family. i was not invited. people get married everyday. 

second, they are both people who i have respect for in their crafts. with that respect, i respect their wish for privacy in that matter. 

third, i'm jealous. i would like to find someone with whom i can share my experience on this earth. since i have yet to find that, i don't feel like looking at a couple who  has. 

fourth, my die-hard beyonce fan friend told me they were married like 4 years ago so...whateve's. 

why i sort of care: i wanna know what her dress looked like. i have to know. not just with her, but with everyday folk. if im somewhere and a wedding is taking place, i must find the bride. i would say 9 times out of 10 i do. and when i don't it actually puts a damper on my day. 

things i'll do when/if i have kids

Thursday, April 24, 2008


I will not invite adults and serve alcohol at their birthday parties (real housewives of NYC) or consume alcoholic beverages with my friends in their presence (amy winehouse). 

see #4

at BGG's request

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Brown Girl Gumbo said: I'd like to read about your thoughts about the current state of R&B & hip-hop music.

i call the crap that comes on the radio my "guilty pleasures". honestly, some of the stuff is funny. when stuck in traffic, i like singing horrible r&b songs at the top of my lungs. and when there's crappy rap on the radio, i like to laugh at the lyrics and act silly while refraining from cursing out ignorant georgia driver #675. 

and that is all that "music" (term used loosely here) is good for. i would never purchase, allow the playing of in front of my nieces, or in anyway support the artist perpetuating the ignorance the spews in a catchy form.  

i have one of those radio transmitters in my car so i can listen to my ipod full of GOOD music and i have CDs. i am guilty of downloading some of said ignorant songs and they do take up space on my ipod. that is because i'm not going to sit through 30 min of song that i just plain hate just to hear the few that make me laugh. 

 lyricism is DEAD. r&b used to be poetic and now it's just "whatever i can rhyme with 'baby'". 

in short, the craft of rap has gone down and any girl who is decent to look at can get a record deal "singing" r&b. but, of course, there are exceptions. 


on leaving spelman's gates

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

i have been reflecting on my time at spelman college. i suppose i had a typical u
ndergraduate experience. drugs, sex, alcohol, parties, etc.- i did none of that...
...say it with
me "GTFOOH!" you know
i did it. you did it, too. and there's nothing wrong if you didn't,
but i did and i'm ok with that. i made decent grades. i wish i'd done better but some things are beyond my control or interest level. i'm also ok with that. i don't have regrets but i tend to wonder what if. so instead of saying "i wish i had..." i'll say "i might have liked to..."

i'll do everything again plus:
1. pledge something- maybe, i don't know. i go back and forth with the
thought. i'm not a legacy and i would have liked to possibly start one. not saying
that my daughter would have to do what i did but rather she could have somewhere to start if she was interested in exploring the world of black greeks. unlike me, she wouldn't have to interrogate members of various organizations to get an idea of what it's all about.

2. study abroad- i wanna travel and i had to get the credits anyway. would have been nice to go outside the country and "kill two birds with one stone" (eww, hate cliches/idioms).

3. a worthwhile summer internship- if i had worked harder and got better grades and built strong relationships with professors, i could have gotten some of the covetted summer internships in my field and have more experience. i'm ok with what i have but it doesn't hurt to be exceptional.

4. better choices in friends and mates- some of the less enjoyable times could have been completely avoided but lesson learned

5. not gain nearly as much weight as i did- still working off the weight. so annoying. i know i didn't gain it overnight but i still wanna wake up and have it gone.

6. cross-registration- being a part of the consortium known as the AUC, i had the option to take courses at morehouse college or clark atlanta university. i did not take advantage of this opportunity because 1. when i started out, i was a biology major and said action would not have been advantageous and 2. after switching my major i was mainly concerned with meeting the requirements and getting away from this place on time. knowing what i know now, i could have afforded to experience coursework at both institutions.


Monday, April 21, 2008
how much is the iraq war costing? $3 trillion. can you spend that money in a wiser way? of course you can. do it at 3trillion.org. 

From: Bush 
To: Me (and anyone who agrees with me)

hopping on T

Sunday, April 20, 2008
T posts hilarious quotes every now and again and i'm copying.

he better call u at the front gate with ice cream, candy, chocolates, dinner, sex all night, wine, champagne, liquor, hair grease, lip gloss, coupons, etc- my friend, on someone who did me kinda wrong.

i don't want to go into detail about what happened but if you did know, you would understand why i don't take to kindly to people with penises. i won't turn to women, but the opposite sex pisses me the hell off! there are some exceptions: my dad, my brothers, my uncles and don. *gone to change my sheets*

P.S. for the record: the outfit i put on was limited edition, never-before-seen, BAD ASS and...he missed it.

Falsetto- The Dream


Saturday, April 19, 2008
Dear God, 
Can I have an 'undo' button?


wake up alone

Friday, April 18, 2008

"whatever you like"

Thursday, April 17, 2008
in Coming to America, prince akeem's  bride responded to everything, "whatever you like". 
now is the time for you to tell me what you like. what would you like to read me ranting about?
leave your topics in the comments and maybe it will get chosen and i'll make a post just for you. 

harder to breathe

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

i got in, but so what?

Tuesday, April 15, 2008
i just got a letter of acceptance to UNC- Greensboro. however, i am well on my way to the George Washington University. oh well, good to know...
The University of North Carolina at Greensboro

things ill do when/if i have kids


i'm going to turn nouns into verbs like a true black mom. does this at all sound familiar?

kid: can i have a nintendo?
mom: you better 'nintendo' that homework

kid: ma, i wanna take karate
mom: you better 'karate' that room clean

*your taxes are due*

it's on me

Monday, April 14, 2008
Product Junkie Diva tagged me.

instructions: 1. link to the person who tagged you; 2. write a six-word memoir; 3. tag 5 more blogs; 4. leave a comment with 5 more blogs to play.

i dont follow directions so i'm going to opt out of number 4.

my memoir: i don't have to impress you

i say this because at the end of the day, you are going to think what you want about me. no amount of trying to convince you otherwise will change whatever concept of me you have made up in your head. in actuality, the more i try to present evidence to the contrary, the more i solidify your ill-concieved notion. so i can only be me and make sure that i am content.




Just Wondering

Eb the Celeb


this day in 1881

Friday, April 11, 2008

Happy Birthday, Spelman College. you look good for 127!!!! convocation was beautiful, despite supposedly grown folks who can't be dignified and feel the need to comment on every word that's said...AND i got to wear my cap and gown for the first time publicly. 


Thursday, April 10, 2008
i dreamed of you this mornin'
then came the dawn and
i thought you were here with me
if you could only see 
how much i love you*

i think of you too often
when the dusk has fallen
i miss what we used to be
if you could only see
how much i love you

i crave your love and being
in your arms this evening
i know that could never be
if you could only see 
how much i love you

tears fill up my eyes
but at the next sun rise
i'll view things much differently
if you had only seen
how much i loved you

*from "soon i'll be loving you again"-marvin gaye, as sampled in "american dreamin'"- jay-z

just so ya know

Wednesday, April 9, 2008
you can probably expect to see a poem or some song im feeling for...i dont know, as long as i have one to post and don't feel like thinking about anything else. me bein' me, i'll probably change my mind. bear with me the next couple of weeks. if you are a regular reader, you know what's going on with me.

living in the past

Tuesday, April 8, 2008
i dont love you. i dont even like you
so why do i ignite you?
i mean evoke you
or these memories of you
and you act as though you never knew
or dont know
we were ever friends or even more
you treat me as if i were a foe
i want to stay while you say "go"
what do you say? do you call me "hoe"
or a past flame that led to woe?
did i make you feel poor
bringing you to make me feel what you felt before?
you continue to ignore
but i implore
i plead and i agitate you
i agrivate you
as if that would make you
that would take you
back to a time 
when you were mine
and i wasn't left for someone else to find
some other man to claim
just for me to blame
him for not having your name
for not thinking your thoughts, speaking in your voice
but i'm here by choice
giving him a chance but not really
not truely
not due-ly
not fully
i'm hurt all over again
trying to find the same man
time and time again
never learning
never turning defeat into gain
never realizing a lesson in my pain
driving my self further insane
so my search is in vain
i keep coming across the same thing
telling myself it's new
knowing inside, it's you
pretending that we aren't through
there. that is the lie. 
mine, not your's is why
so many nights i cry
as many days i sigh
so badly i want it to cease
for me to be at peace
to be able to release
to just let go
like you did me
but i can't help but be
like "maybe he...
...and then maybe we..."

things i'll do when/if i have kids

Monday, April 7, 2008


i will not take my small child(ren)/infant(s) to movies 1. starting after 7 pm and 2. that are not for children. when you have kids you have to make that sacrifice that you might not be able to go to the movie as soon as it comes out or on opening night. nobody wants Screamtisia poppin' off in their ear while they are trying to listen to Denzel talk extra hard about something ( i love me some Denzel, though. he just enunciates really well). furthermore, subject matter in films are not appropriate unless they are geared toward kids and even then, it can be questionable. also, movie theaters are germ-y as crap! there wont be all too many trips to the theater in the first place. until they build up some serious antibodies, we'll be watching dvds at home or maybe by the time i have kids they will actually just be plugging movies into their brains and they can watch it like a dream or something (no stealing my idea if nobody is already working on that).


love is a losing game

Sunday, April 6, 2008

i WAS 'bout ready to scream on somebody

Friday, April 4, 2008
School Without Walls Senior High School has closed

thats what i thought for about 5 minutes due to some misinformation from a frie
nd. my high school, of which i have both fond and not-so-fond memories, is merely being renovated. LONG OVERDUE, but whatev's. it took some private funding in exchange for their parking lot to get it done because clearly, DCPS has limited funds. THANK YOU, Bush Administration. so anyway, first i was thinking they straight just closed it. then i got info. from the DCPS site that they moved it and i calmed down a little but i was still like "that's wack". finally, good ol' wikipedia told me that it was a temporary move in order for the school to be renovated and they'd be back. 

thank you, GWU, for your generosity but...where are the teachers supposed to park? and please don't think this is some underhanded way to acquire the building completely. i know it's smack in the middle of your campus and all but 
guess who else will be all up IN the foggy bottom section of the city? ME (remember? u admitted me so it's your fault) and you can count on me and my big brother throwing a FIT if you try to take our school away. 

so yea, you're wondering what the hell is a School Without Walls? well after four years of guys saying "that's aiight, you don't have to tell me what school you go to. can i still call you?", i'm really not about to go through that explanation in depth. it's a public high school in Washington DC. 

this is embarrassing:
my girl, tiara, was able to duck out of the photo. lucky her! im guessing this was senior year in the art room. 

i want this

MAC's Neo Sci-Fi line (available May)


Thursday, April 3, 2008
some jerk did a study and determined that women with degrees above bachelors are more likely to divorce than men with the same degrees and women who have only completed undergrad. reason # 675 for me to not get married in the first place. i doubt there are that many reasons; that's just the arbitrary number i ALWAYS use when there are multiple reasons for something. oh well, if i don't get that M.A., i can't get paid in the line of work im in. i gotsta get paid 'cause mama said "don't be depending on no man. have your own". 

for me to be really concerned, i would need to know more info. on the participants involved in, location of, duration of...a full print out of the study. 

in rare form

you are the ocean that erases writings in the sand
your love is the force behind the tide
your passion is the burning rays of sun
and my love is the wind; invisible yet it cannot hide

my heart is the sand, marred with footprints
my smile is the blue sky, a reflection of you
my soul is a rock whose core you have touched
and losing you is the worst thing i could ever do

what am i doing that you like...

Wednesday, April 2, 2008
so i can stop!

i don't know what it is about me that attracts people, specifically men, who i am not interested in. and it's not me being shallow or egotistic. it's just nothing impresses me about men who are loud. i'm loud, what do i need with your boisterous self? plus something is just odd about you yelling in hallways in a place of business no matter how informally constituents may present themselves (see post entitled "SMH").  AND you did this on two separate occassions. im so sorry, but i'm not that serious. i'm just not. bringing me to my next point. there is something not very genuine about a man who is just SO "in" to me, especially when i do not reciprocate. finally, how do you tell someone "no, i dont want to hug you. i don't know you. i prefer not to be touched" politely? i dont even know if i'm obligated to be polite when there are unwanted advances being made toward me. 

ignore the fact that they eventually dated but focus on what happened in this scene

so how does a man gain my interest? uh...i couldn't tell you that. not because i think someone would see this and feign possessing the enumerated qualities, but rather because i don't know. that is not really an area of focus for me right now. additionally, my wants, interests, likes, and dislikes will be different at any given time that you ask me. ugh, and honestly i am still very mad at all men. yes, i am generalizing to all based on the acts of few, or many depending on how you look at it....

FREE: recycle through the mail

you got a new cell/pda/computer/thing-that-will-be-obsolete-in-two-years. CONGRATS!!!! but what are you going to do with the thing you don't want anymore or doesn't work that you probably had for less than 24 months? you can mail it out of your life in pre-paid envelopes provided in several post offices in 10 major US cities.Mail back inkjet cartridges, PDAs,
Blackberries, digital cameras, and MP3 players. i know some companies already offer this service but say you lost that envelope when you first go the thing or you bought from a company that was not so environmentally friendly. if you don't live in DC, Chicago, L.A., or another major city, look for it this fall if the pilot is successful.  Learn more about this pilot program: http://www.usps.com/communications/newsroom/2008/pr08_028.htm.