as i sit IRRITATED

allowing my pre-poo to marinate before i use my pantene beautiful lengths shampoo and conditioner, im a little confused about why there's so little product left for something i cant recall any impression of. was i simply distracted by a new unexpected aquisition or was i desperately looking for an alternative? whatever.

the real reason for this post is ive been thinking about how much a do not enjoy relying on others. i feel like ive never fully established any independence. the closest i'd come was my apartment in atlanta. while i researched and selected my home for my final year of undergrad on my own, i still depended on my parents (my dad) to support me financially. now that im back living with them, probably more than the archaic lifestyle i must abide by, i loathe being a dependent.

i hate needing money for books and other school-related expenses. i hate having to ask for supplemental funding for leisure activities or for gas money. i hate when my car needs scheduled maintenance or something else unforseeable occurs like someone knocking off my side mirror. i hate relying on unbalanced/unhealthy/bad-tasting grocery item choices.

i feel like i'll never get out of my current situation. employers seem completely unreasonable. im constantly hit with the following response just not in these words: "i see that you've been in school your entire life but where is your experience?" im 23 years old. where do you expect me to get experience? that is why im looking for ENTRY LEVEL work. wtf is wrong with people? i have no faith in humans. their intelligence seems to be completely lacking. i cant go around telling people "yes, i have a master's but im only 24" come december. i feel like if you see on my resume that college and grad school dates are chronological with no gaps, common sense would give you a clue as to how old i am. but no one really reads a resume anyway...which is another problem.

im completely frustrated and irritated and not a fun person to be around today. worse than any of this is the fact that i feel like NO ONE understands nor can they help. and im tired of explaining my situation in vain just to get a blank stare and topic change. i really wish people would stop asking what im doing and what it means to be doing what im doing and what job will i have then...