my non-boyfriend (this may be a brief series)

i met my non-boyfriend online. after talking for 5 minutes, i agreed to meet him at applebee's. those of you who follow me on twitter (@a_banger) may recall my tweets about him being tardy for the party. actually he was beyond tardy. he arrived an HOUR after our agreed upon time. so lets pause right here and talk about why i wait 1 hour for ANYONE ever because you all know i hate to wait:

i waited because 1) i lied to my parents about where i was going so if i came back home too soon, theyd know i lied 2) i was STARVING and if im never gonna talk to you again, i will get a free meal out of the deal + drinks as compensation for wasting my time.

ok, got it? *unpause* so he shows up and im like "this child is about 20-30 lbs lighter than he was in his pics". so there's disappointment #2 i do not like skinny dudes. the plan at this point is to get my food and however many drinks he'll pay for and go home. service was a bit slower than i would have liked so we actually had some decent conversation. i sorta enjoyed myself at least up until the phrase "my daughter" was so CASUALLY slipped into the conversation. like to the point where there was no hesistation or after thought. like you have a 4-year-old daughter? that's a deal-breaker.

so as the evening progresses, and probably with the aid of alcohol, i felt like "hey, i actually do not mind spending time with this dude". he seemed genuinely interested in me and eager to see me again and i did not deny that wish. *more to come*